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cheerfuldom 07:02 PM 04-12-2012
Originally Posted by SunshineMama:
I am putting a lot of pressure on myself! Part of the problem is that, all of the sudden, they are all determined at once to get their kids potty trained at all costs. I have a written policy that they must ask for 2 weeks before wearing underwear, which DCM of DCB4 clearly ignored. I let it go today because I thought, that since he is 4, I wanted to give him a chance to make the choice to go. I really wanted to support the child in his efforts! Now I am afraid I opened up a big can of worms

The other parents are set on their kids being out of diapers by the end of next month. One of the kids will ask to go, the other will follow if they see candy being distributed, but I am literally taking them to the bathroom all day long. I cant get anything else done!

At this point, I feel like I already let the parents dictate what is going on at my house (my fault, I know), and I am feeling a loss of control over my own business. I am doing "special" for everyone and it is killing me, since everyone wants it at the same time. I also feel like, since I already committed, that it is too late to un-commit to taking this on, hence me seeking a way to get them trained right away. I am afraid these parents are all going to bring their kids in undies and I am going to be cleaning pee and worse all over my house. Ugh- I am a people pleaser and an over-achiever, and I have always been able to conquer every challenge. This one is getting me though. I literally lost weight this week because I have been running around like crazy trying to please everyone. I run a group daycare, and everyone is treating me like their personal nanny.

I literally cried today. I cried to my husband, my best friend, my grandma... I really can't handle watching 6 multi-aged kids while potty training 3 of them. They are asking to go potty in between times when I take them, and I am taking them several times a day too. I am tired of spending my day in the bathroom. I am spending more time with THEIR kids than my own, which I am also upset about. My 1 year old and my 1 year old dcb have been so good and patient, but I need to give them more attention. I am doing this for MY kid, after all.

I can easily handle all of the kids normally, but I am spending hours cumulatively in the bathroom. I also do a preschool-inspired program, so I am teaching for a portion of the day as well. I am burnt out, but I feel like I have committed already to doing this and I don't know how to gain control back. I also feel that if I am taking them almost hourly, and they are still peeing in their diapers, that they clearly are not ready yet and we are forcing it. I am feeling a lot of pressure from the parents too. I have been doing daycare for almost a year now and this is my first experience with training other people's kids, so it is a learning process. I feel like I messed up and didnt put my foot down and I dont know how to fix it.
Its not too late to "uncommit"....send home a copy of your pottying policy highlighting what you can and cannot do with extra notes regarding the underwear issue and the fact that many kids find it challenging to master pottying away from home so it is normal that daycare may take longer than home. Make it positive with a note stating that you are happy to support the kids in this milestone but will be requiring all parents to abide by the policies they have already agreed to. Then you figure out what you CAN do as far as a timeline for pottying and stick with that. The kids need to learn to hold it and go at the regular times. They will potty train with that method if they are ready. There is no way you can continue going anytime anyone asks. They need to start working on independence.....undressing, pottying, redressing, washing hands without you there every second. That IS a part of potty training. Take the control back! It is very ridiculous that you are losing weight and crying every day over this.....there is NO reason you should do this to yourself!!!
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