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Unregistered 11:10 AM 04-28-2017
I have been providing child care for 20 years and I cannot believe what I am experiencing with MOST of the children in my care right now.

-No matter what I do, they don't seem to listen. I have tried everything I know how to do to help them learn to listen and researched different methods, and nothing is working. I will literally say 'please sit down while I am in the bathroom' and within 10 seconds most of the kids get up and are running around. I expect this from toddlers, but 4 and 5 year olds? They can't sit for 2 minutes?
I've tried rewards, time outs, taking away priveleges, talking nice, talking firmly....doesn't matter.
-Lack of respect for adults. This is rampant. I am really good about preparing the kids for 'what we are doing next'. They don't care. They don't want to cooperate. At pickup time, they are uncooperative with parents, kicking their shoes off and attempting to run back up my stairs. At 3, 4 and 5 years of age. I ask them to stop a behavior (like scratching a toy up and down my wall). They keep doing it.
-Sneaky behavior. As soon as my back is turned, grabbing toys from other kids, going somewhere they shouldn't etc. Disruptive behavior during nap time in 3-5 year olds.
-They are not able to wipe their own noses (instead they are constantly wiping their nose with their hands, even with redirection). I show them how to wipe and where to throw the tissue away, it never seems to improve. 2-5 year olds.
-Can't put on their own shoes, jacket etc. Zippers are hard, I get it, but I feel like 4 and 5 year olds should be able to do this.

I am completely exhausted by the end of the day from all of the behavior management. I have replaced families with new families, and I am seeing the same thing over and over. Toddlers that constantly scream for what they want instead of attempting to non-verbally or verbally communicate. I feel like the spoken word means NOTHING to these kids any more.
Is anyone else experiencing this????
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Laurie 11:18 AM 04-28-2017
I use to have kids like that a while back. It's exhausting for sure and completely unexceptable to me. SO, I reorganized my daycare. I now only take infants!! I raise them to be courteous and kind Then I send them off to pre-school and fill the spot with another infant! It's been so nice and I'm so glad I did it!!

I'm so sorry for all your frustration and hardship!! Kids are not like they use to be... sadly!!
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thrivingchildcarecom 12:16 PM 04-28-2017
Yes, yes & YES! I don't mean to be MEAN, but I think these millennial parents are the worse. They allow their children to misbehave and talk back without correction. So of course, they extend that to other adults. And some of these kids are downright mean. We do our best while they are in our care, but if the parents don't follow suit at home what can you do?

Lately, I have tried explaining to parents that if they don't get a handle on the bad behavior they will have to deal with it for a long time to come. I mean we only have the child for a short time. They will have to manage without us for a much longer period of time.

Anyway, just wanted you to know I definately get you and wish I had the answer, but its really not us.
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Ariana 02:24 PM 04-28-2017
I have one set of kids like this. It is exhausting. The 15 month old hits and pinches the mom in the face and mom laughs. The older son is 3 and is constantly whining and cannot control his impulses. I cannot leave him unsupervised for a second. Luckily I only see them 2 days a week because all of my 6 kids are part timers. If I had this kid 5 days a week I would be finding a bridge to jump off of!
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Pestle 02:57 PM 04-28-2017
I'm not seeing it so far in the children of Millennials. I'm seeing it in the children of Gen Xers who put off having kids until later in life. They are awestruck at their kids and think everything about them is perfect and delightful. (Kids are delightful, yes. You should be devoted to your children, yes. But they need you to know what you're doing.) The younger parents I've had so far are determined and do research. I'm between the generations and usually identify myself as Gen X, but this I want no part of!
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KiwiKids 06:18 PM 04-28-2017
Originally Posted by Pestle:
I'm not seeing it so far in the children of Millennials. I'm seeing it in the children of Gen Xers who put off having kids until later in life. They are awestruck at their kids and think everything about them is perfect and delightful. (Kids are delightful, yes. You should be devoted to your children, yes. But they need you to know what you're doing.) The younger parents I've had so far are determined and do research. I'm between the generations and usually identify myself as Gen X, but this I want no part of!
Same here! I'm in my early 30s. My older parents let kiddo run the show to an insane degree. My parents my age are the same! My families in their 20s are the most balanced. It surprises me but so far the kids behave for me. I have one testing boundaries currently but she still listens.
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Unregistered 08:51 PM 04-28-2017
my most winey kid is the one with the worst parent. Im stunned at the way some of the parents (i'm talking 4 or 5) in our center talk to there kids. Ive had parents say shut up, you brat, your the devil, Ill smack you up your face. Had a parent smack her kids hands for a potty accident last week. The kids then act like this when there with there friends, hitting, using not kind words... Frustrating
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Josiegirl 03:01 AM 05-01-2017
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
my most winey kid is the one with the worst parent. Im stunned at the way some of the parents (i'm talking 4 or 5) in our center talk to there kids. Ive had parents say shut up, you brat, your the devil, Ill smack you up your face. Had a parent smack her kids hands for a potty accident last week. The kids then act like this when there with there friends, hitting, using not kind words... Frustrating
That's so sad. And ya know, even with all the training and positive things we try and use the 40-50+ hours they're with us, you just cannot undo the environment they live in.
I have really good parents at the moment. Some started off by thinking every single thing their child did was beyond cute but found out, either as their child got older or their family grew, that they needed to change their parenting ways. I do have 1 dcf still, that thinks they shouldn't have consequences but we're working on that.
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Sherrihoos 08:05 AM 05-02-2017
It is amazing how a 20 month old behaves as soon as a parent arrives. It's my constant frustration! I'm raising 6 of my own children and have babysat for 18 years and I'm appalled at how parents in the last few years allow their children to behave.
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midaycare 08:50 AM 05-02-2017
I've had both genx'ers and millenials kids who were like this. I'm 40, not sure what exactly that makes me.

I think that the point was made above that parents who wait to have kids are waaaaaay too delightes by everything they do. So, no discipline.

I'm noticing millenials are too heavy on the discipline. So...opposite but it causes a very similar effect.

Either way, it takes training to get these children to behave well. Lots of it.
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Blackcat31 10:21 AM 05-02-2017
Originally Posted by Pestle:
I'm not seeing it so far in the children of Millennials. I'm seeing it in the children of Gen Xers who put off having kids until later in life. They are awestruck at their kids and think everything about them is perfect and delightful. (Kids are delightful, yes. You should be devoted to your children, yes. But they need you to know what you're doing.) The younger parents I've had so far are determined and do research. I'm between the generations and usually identify myself as Gen X, but this I want no part of!
I've found the parents that waited to have kids (regardless of what "generation" they were born in) are the toughest parents to work with too!

.....and on a side note, this was shared with me and I thought it was funny and on topic so I am sharing...

Not dissing anyone just thought it was funny...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RGvr...ature=youtu.be
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momofsix 11:08 AM 05-02-2017
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
I've found the parents that waited to have kids (regardless of what "generation" they were born in) are the toughest parents to work with too!

.....and on a side note, this was shared with me and I thought it was funny and on topic so I am sharing...

Not dissing anyone just thought it was funny...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RGvr...ature=youtu.be


I just sent this to all my millennial daughters, this was great! Thankfully they don't act like the stereotypical millennial! Although some do make their own kambucha, one's a vegan... lol
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Ariana 11:37 AM 05-02-2017
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
I've found the parents that waited to have kids (regardless of what "generation" they were born in) are the toughest parents to work with too!

.....and on a side note, this was shared with me and I thought it was funny and on topic so I am sharing...

Not dissing anyone just thought it was funny...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RGvr...ature=youtu.be
Love it

It reminds me of a news piece I watched about how millenials are having trouble affording housing in Toronto. They show this one girl with her hair all highlighted, perfectly done, fake eyelashes, nails done, expensive boots and handbag, allllll of the latest and greatest furnishings in her home, allll of the latest gadgets and then getting into her brand new car

Yeah I didn't feel so bad for them after that! Whatever happened to surviving on beans and wieners when you are first starting out?
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Mike 02:10 PM 05-02-2017
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
I've found the parents that waited to have kids (regardless of what "generation" they were born in) are the toughest parents to work with too!

.....and on a side note, this was shared with me and I thought it was funny and on topic so I am sharing...

Not dissing anyone just thought it was funny...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RGvr...ature=youtu.be
Only $2900/m. I'll sponsor 1 or 2.
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LysesKids 05:06 PM 05-02-2017
Originally Posted by Mike:
Only $2900/m. I'll sponsor 1 or 2.
So not my kids - my kids are doing better without outside support lol... they all have good careers & college degrees that are worth something & 2 of the 3 own a home (#3 is military).
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JackandJill 05:57 PM 05-02-2017
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
I've found the parents that waited to have kids (regardless of what "generation" they were born in) are the toughest parents to work with too!

.....and on a side note, this was shared with me and I thought it was funny and on topic so I am sharing...

Not dissing anyone just thought it was funny...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RGvr...ature=youtu.be
This is hysterical!
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Tags:burnout, stress, time off
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