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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>New Family That Doesn't Get Policies
Mom2Two 10:29 PM 08-19-2017
Has anyone had a new family that just didn't seem to understand that our policies and procedures are part of our business?

I Just started a new family who has never had a child in daycare before. My policies state that parents provide formula, that I participate in the CACFP, and I told them in interview and by email that I bill by Venmo.

When I emailed about setting up Venmo, mom said she'd "look into it." I'm not sure if she meant that she'd figure out how to do it or if she thought Venmo was optional.

When I called before the first day about mom bringing bottles and formula, I told her that I'd provide the cereal etc. But then the next (her first) day, mom says that dcb "doesn't need formula during the day, because he gets it for breakfast and dinner."

I just hope that this doesn't turn into push back on every policy! So far it seems like what I say goes in one ear and out the other or that she thinks she can be selective about my policies.

She's a teacher and I really thought she'd understand about procedure and how to be a good parent to work with.

I feel like somehow I've got to get her to understand that my policies are a big deal and are based on what I have found works well/doesn't work well. And I've got to get our relationship back on track. Sheesh...parent training!
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laundrymom 07:43 AM 08-20-2017
Cacfp requires you to offer formula. The parents can choose to provide but if they choose not to providers must.
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storybookending 07:58 AM 08-20-2017
Originally Posted by Mom2Two:
Has anyone had a new family that just didn't seem to understand that our policies and procedures are part of our business?

I Just started a new family who has never had a child in daycare before. My policies state that parents provide formula, that I participate in the CACFP, and I told them in interview and by email that I bill by Venmo.

When I emailed about setting up Venmo, mom said she'd "look into it." I'm not sure if she meant that she'd figure out how to do it or if she thought Venmo was optional.

When I called before the first day about mom bringing bottles and formula, I told her that I'd provide the cereal etc. But then the next (her first) day, mom says that dcb "doesn't need formula during the day, because he gets it for breakfast and dinner."

I just hope that this doesn't turn into push back on every policy! So far it seems like what I say goes in one ear and out the other or that she thinks she can be selective about my policies.

She's a teacher and I really thought she'd understand about procedure and how to be a good parent to work with.

I feel like somehow I've got to get her to understand that my policies are a big deal and are based on what I have found works well/doesn't work well. And I've got to get our relationship back on track. Sheesh...parent training!
How old is the child in question?
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trix23 08:16 AM 08-20-2017
I would state that Venmo is the only acceptable form of payment you take and that she needs to set it up right away.

If she's required to provide formula, then she needs to do that. Babies between the ages of 0-12 months have a bottle every 2-4 hours in daycare. Tell her that you are required to offer a bottle every 3-4 hours minimum to babies 12 months and younger per licensing standards.
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Mom2Two 12:33 PM 08-20-2017
Originally Posted by laundrymom:
Cacfp requires you to offer formula. The parents can choose to provide but if they choose not to providers must.
Yes, but don't I get to choose the brand? Mom says that baby only does well with Similac. I already told her that I provide Parent's choice.

But my bigger concern is that she's already not listening on day one.
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Unregistered 12:40 PM 08-20-2017
Originally Posted by Mom2Two:
Yes, but don't I get to choose the brand? Mom says that baby only does well with Similac. I already told her that I provide Parent's choice.

But my bigger concern is that she's already not listening on day one.
Yes, you get to choose the brand you will provide and it's the parent's choice to go with your brand or provide their own that they prefer.

As for not listening and following your policies this would be a big red flag that this family may not be a good fit for your program. If it was me I would be up front with dcm about what they need to do/provide in order to continue with my program. I don't have the time or energy to deal with their issues.
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Mom2Two 12:45 PM 08-20-2017
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
As for not listening and following your policies this would be a big red flag that this family may not be a good fit for your program. If it was me I would be up front with dcm about what they need to do/provide in order to continue with my program. I don't have the time or energy to deal with their issues.
I know. I know that when I talk with her (today or tomorrow) the biggest thing we need to talk about is that my policies are very solid, and that she needs to read them again and make sure this is what she wants. I need to really emphasize it.

Mom is a math teacher and dad is an accountant--it's not like they're idiots. Surely that can understand this?
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Rockgirl 01:53 PM 08-20-2017
I think many times, they do understand just fine, but want to feel they are in control.
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Mom2Two 02:03 PM 08-20-2017
I'm drafting an email, and this is what I've got so far:

Hi DCM,

I picked up some Similac for dcb, and I will just add it to your bill. Remember that my policy is that I can provide Parent's Choice brand, but any other brand needs to be provided by parents, per my written policies.

Also, Venmo is how I bill everyone, and my next billing is in two weeks, so it just needs to be working from your end in a week or so.

I have been wondering if there is a misunderstanding about my policies or if it's just been a while since you were able to read them. I've attached another copy just in case.

I am quite firm about my policies, and this is pretty normal for daycares. With each family being very different, and so many little wigglers to take care of, daycare owners need to make sure everyone is on the same page.

I wasn't sure if I should email you about this or talk to you in person, but I feel like I need to be really clear about it so there aren't any misunderstandings going forward.

Thanks,

Jane

This stuff is just so awkward. Yuck! (That part is not in the email, hee hee)
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Mom2Two 02:28 PM 08-20-2017
I sent it.

Ahhhhhhhhhh!

I need to remember:
(1) This is a normal part of running a daycare business
(2) My self-respect is not for sale.

<sigh>
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Rockgirl 02:29 PM 08-20-2017
Originally Posted by Mom2Two:
I sent it.

Ahhhhhhhhhh!

I need to remember:
(1) This is a normal part of running a daycare business
(2) My self-respect is not for sale.

<sigh>
Those are definitely things we all need to remember!
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LysesKids 02:31 PM 08-20-2017
Originally Posted by Mom2Two:
Yes, but don't I get to choose the brand? Mom says that baby only does well with Similac. I already told her that I provide Parent's choice.

But my bigger concern is that she's already not listening on day one.
Then mom has to provide; make sure your written policies state that you provide such & such formula, but if the parent want to use another brand THEY MUST provide it. If they show up without it turn them away until they supply it. Just because she wants Similac does it mean you have to pay for it... Same for other policies - she's ignoring you; grow a back bone & say, my way or "you" leave. It's your business, you aren't her employee
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Leigh 03:23 PM 08-20-2017
Originally Posted by Mom2Two:
I'm drafting an email, and this is what I've got so far:

Hi DCM,

I picked up some Similac for dcb, and I will just add it to your bill. Remember that my policy is that I can provide Parent's Choice brand, but any other brand needs to be provided by parents, per my written policies.

Also, Venmo is how I bill everyone, and my next billing is in two weeks, so it just needs to be working from your end in a week or so.

I have been wondering if there is a misunderstanding about my policies or if it's just been a while since you were able to read them. I've attached another copy just in case.

I am quite firm about my policies, and this is pretty normal for daycares. With each family being very different, and so many little wigglers to take care of, daycare owners need to make sure everyone is on the same page.

I wasn't sure if I should email you about this or talk to you in person, but I feel like I need to be really clear about it so there aren't any misunderstandings going forward.

Thanks,

Jane

This stuff is just so awkward. Yuck! (That part is not in the email, hee hee)
Remember, too, that with CACFP, formula is NOT optional-you must serve it, whether DCM wants you to or not. She MUST either accept your brand or provide her own, but you CAN NOT skip formula.
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Mom2Two 10:54 AM 08-22-2017
In the end it went okay. I think mom was slightly taken aback and maybe a bit nervous that I confronted the problem so directly, but in the long run it was for the best, because it would have bothered me a lot the whole rest of the day.

Mom showed up with her formula at 7:30 am the next day. I made sure that I was very nice and kind and sent lots of photos so that she knew there were no hard feelings. I just needed that formula, lol!

Thinking it though more, I feel more certain that it's a good rule. Otherwise, providers would have to run around buying a bunch of different formula types. That might work for some, but I don't really want to do that. It's kinda like sunscreen or lotion--if you have special requirements, just supply your own.
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rosieteddy 12:08 PM 08-22-2017
I always had parents provide all food and formula until child turned 1 yr old.Then I would add them to food program.I had parents leave formula,, veggies ,fruit and cereal for the month.This way they had control of what brand they wanted to use .
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Ariana 12:30 PM 08-22-2017
I had this family too. Gave them an email copy and a hard copy of my policies but they continue to auestion everything even now! I just reiterate over and over and assume they are just really dumb

Glad it worked out in the end and Inthink you sent a clear message that you are the one in charge
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Mom2Two 05:05 PM 08-22-2017
Originally Posted by Ariana:
I had this family too. Gave them an email copy and a hard copy of my policies but they continue to auestion everything even now! I just reiterate over and over and assume they are just really dumb

Glad it worked out in the end and Inthink you sent a clear message that you are the one in charge
I know...I was trying to count how many times I talked with her about formula...interview...written policies...phone call the day before her first day.

I kept wondering if she was just a super distracted person or if she was kinda passive aggressive and didn't take agreements seriously. But I wanted to cover my bases either way. :-D
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Tags:parents - dont know how, policies
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