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Parents and Guardians Forum>Is Pick-Up Time An Issue?
dhsu25 05:30 AM 10-17-2015
I have a 20-month-old and I was wondering if it might bother kids her age to be picked-up last or later than other kids?

I'm not talking about being picked up after closing time, just later than other kids where she might be one of the last few still at daycare (her daycare uses a flex hour system).

If it doesn't bother her, is there an age where it might?
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Thriftylady 05:57 AM 10-17-2015
Someone always has to be last in life. I don't think it should be an issue. Of course the sooner you can pick up to spend time together the better, but it isn't always possible to be early.
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littletots 06:42 AM 10-17-2015
I'm a FCC provider w a 16m; 20m; 2y2m; 5y & 6y siblings, my personal 3y11m. I think it's more personality than age. Everyone likes to go 1st and no one likes to be last. Even my son likes dad to check him out & do stuff some days. I have one dck who gets sad as soon as 1st child leaves. The siblings get p/u last but if by some chance they go even 15mins sooner they act like they've won the jackpot. Children miss us as parents & enjoy spending as much time with as possible with us. My now 25y son admits his fondness memories were quiet time together star gazing.
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spedmommy4 08:55 AM 10-17-2015
At 20 months, as long as the teacher is engaged with your child after the others go home, I would say no. Towards the preschool years, kids really start to notice and talk about it. The kids here try to predict which mom/dad will show up first. Within my group, it's great that they all have early days once in awhile.
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Second Home 10:44 AM 10-17-2015
I have noticed that most of my dck are used to the schedule of who leaves first , second , etc...
What seems to bother my older ( 4+ yrs) dck is when the one who usually leaves first leaves last . They see everyone else leaving and know they should have already left and want to know why their mon / dad has not come yet .
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Josiegirl 12:52 PM 10-17-2015
My dcks are ages 15 months- 3 1/2 yo. Nobody seems to worry if their parent is last, they're all excited to see whose parent is picking up at the moment(I have great dcps). Plus as the #s dwindle down they get more time alone with me, which they seem to appreciate at the end of a long busy active day with their friends. I do have to say that my 15 month old twins are the first to be picked up and they go all crazy gaga when mommy comes.
I agree with spedmommy, as long as the caregiver stays engaged with your 20 mo, it shouldn't be an issue.
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Febby 05:11 PM 10-17-2015
I work at a center in a three year old room. The children notice if they get picked up early or late, but the children who are usually picked up later don't seem to be particularly bothered by it. My center closes at 6 and I usually still have 3-5 children at 5:50. Whoever is the last one to get picked up, usually gets to walk around the center with me while I turn in paperwork, get a mop, etc. and they think it's great fun.

The ones who are usually picked up early DO get bothered by late pickups because they're not used to it. They start to get worried and I've had more than one child ask me if their mom/dad forgot to come pick them up.

At 20 months, your child probably isn't bothered by the late pickups. As long as her needs are being met by her teacher(s), she's fine. I'm sure she'd rather get picked up earlier and spend more time with you, but if that's not possible then that's not possible.
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Play Care 05:37 AM 10-19-2015
Originally Posted by spedmommy4:
At 20 months, as long as the teacher is engaged with your child after the others go home, I would say no. Towards the preschool years, kids really start to notice and talk about it. The kids here try to predict which mom/dad will show up first. Within my group, it's great that they all have early days once in awhile.
This.
It also depends on the child. My day care mainly consists of teachers kids, so mostly everyone is gone by 4 and not here on vacations and other days off from school.
I've had some non-teachers kids in the past who didn't seem to notice or care (perhaps they liked the one on one, or the special things we were able to do with fewer kids?) but I have one SA boy now who complained so much to his mom about always being last picked up and being here on non school days and having no other kids (besides his sibs) to play with that she rearranged her work schedule to pick him and his sibs up early (they are now usually the first to leave) At my suggestion she will be using a SA camp on school vacations (where there will be a lot more kids) or working from home and keeping him with her.
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daycarediva 09:48 AM 10-19-2015
Originally Posted by Second Home:
I have noticed that most of my dck are used to the schedule of who leaves first , second , etc...
What seems to bother my older ( 4+ yrs) dck is when the one who usually leaves first leaves last . They see everyone else leaving and know they should have already left and want to know why their mon / dad has not come yet .
This exactly. If you're going to be late- even if you've notified me and it's ok by me. It IS going to bother your child (depending on age). They get that routine down PAT. I also hear kids complain when their parent picks up early "WHY ARE YOU HERE NOW? I don't leave school yet!"

Some kids are more sensitive though, and as soon as the numbers start to get low, the "Where's my Mommy?" Starts. They get a quick reminder "Your mommy comes after Susie's Mommy. Maybe they're racing to get here!"

The last kid at my house gets to sit up at the table with my kids while they do homework and I get dinner started. They usually get a drink or small snack and color and hang out with us all. We are a big loud family so it's always entertaining. I have to PRY them out of the house at the end of the night.
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dhsu25 08:34 PM 10-21-2015
Thanks for all thoughtful responses. Very informative, some even entertaining!
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knoxmomof2 09:32 PM 02-22-2016
I know this is an older post, but I wanted to chime in. I care for 4 children in my home, I've done it for over 3 years now. I've never had an issue with the last child being unhappy. They seem to see it the same way as I do: they get time alone with me and we usually do neat stuff that they don't usually get to participate in when more than 1 child is present. Either we'll do a fun activity in the daycare room that they are asking to do with me, or they'll join me in the kitchen while I clean up or start dinner. There's usually a 15 minute gap at the most though for the last one leaving so it's not that impactful.
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