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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Do You Allow Unannounced Visits and/or Pick Up?
Crazy Baby 02:05 PM 05-17-2017
I was just reading through some of your FAQS on that recent thread and wondering what are some of your answers to those questions.

Of course you can't hold someone's child hostage, but do you discourage unannounced visits or pick ups by parents/guardians?

I always encourage the parent to text me if they are going to be early so as not to interrupt nap time or some other activity. I also discourage parents from hanging around too long because the children turn in to total terrors. This is normal, right?

What do you do?
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Blackcat31 02:29 PM 05-17-2017
Originally Posted by Crazy Baby:
I was just reading through some of your FAQS on that recent thread and wondering what are some of your answers to those questions.

Of course you can't hold someone's child hostage, but do you discourage unannounced visits or pick ups by parents/guardians?

I always encourage the parent to text me if they are going to be early so as not to interrupt nap time or some other activity. I also discourage parents from hanging around too long because the children turn in to total terrors. This is normal, right?

What do you do?
I have an open door policy.

Open door policy means that a parent or legal guardian can stop by ANY time (announced or unannounced) to pick up their child.

I would never deny a parent access to their child.

Open door policy does NOT mean they get to visit or hang around. It just means they can pick up ANY time.

If, however a parent made a habit of arriving during our rest time or during times I have requested they refrain from doing so, they may be terminated.

I have nothing to hide and actually encourage parents to drop in unannounced for pick up 2-3 times a year.

I am always careful to elaborate my thoughts about this topic for parents.

Their understanding and mine are usually not the same.
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EntropyControlSpecialist 02:31 PM 05-17-2017
I don't allow pick ups during nap time. Or if we are away at a park since they need to sign out and collect their child's belongings.

Otherwise, they can pick up anytime.

Visits? This isn't an aquarium. We do not have parents coming just to watch. They can watch my classroom when they pick up their child and their child is putting on their shoes. Or, when we are having a group celebration (like Muffins with Mom or Donuts with Dad which are 30 minute events at the end of the day). Otherwise, no.
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hwichlaz 02:34 PM 05-17-2017
Open door policy.....but if they drop in, they need to take their kid with them when they go. Little ones can't tell time and won't understand why mom is leaving without them a second time. I do make exceptions for nursing mothers. I've had many mothers drop in to nurse their babies on their lunch hour. <3
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Snowmom 02:39 PM 05-17-2017
Originally Posted by Crazy Baby:
I was just reading through some of your FAQS on that recent thread and wondering what are some of your answers to those questions.

Of course you can't hold someone's child hostage, but do you discourage unannounced visits or pick ups by parents/guardians?

I always encourage the parent to text me if they are going to be early so as not to interrupt nap time or some other activity. I also discourage parents from hanging around too long because the children turn in to total terrors. This is normal, right?

What do you do?
I don't mind if parents pick up early, as long as it's before 12:30 or after 3:00. I would never keep a child from their parent (if they show up during nap), but I make it clear that I will terminate for it.
I think it's extremely disrespectful to the 10 other families in my care when they interrupt their sleeping schedules. It's selfish and I won't tolerate it.

But, my home's layout is very open and there is no way visitors coming and going wouldn't wake up every child.
I even scold my husband if he comes home during nap.

As far as extended visits: an emphatic no. Again, it's disrespectful to the other families in care. We rely on a very regimented routine. It keeps everyone happy. Throw in a visitor, and you've just eliminated an activity for us and thrown our entire routine off... lunch is 20+ minutes late, nap is 20+ minutes late, potty time and snack....yeah, not happening.
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hwichlaz 02:48 PM 05-17-2017
I've gotten pretty good an enforcing staying on routine when we have visitors out of necessity. I've built my reputation as a provider that will take special needs children. As a result we have occupational therapists in and out of the facility a lot. They've learned to do what they do while I do what I do. I keep a loose eye on them so I can see how they are helping the child and implement some of the same things in my program, but other than that, we just go on with our day.
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Ariana 03:25 PM 05-17-2017
Parent can come at any time but I ask as a courtesy that they let me know, either the day before or at least that morning of or whatever. I discourage pickups during nap times unless previously arranged because they are disruptive. I can't keep a child from their parents though so these are just guidelines. The only "visits" are during transition period.

I don't always come upstairs to answer the door during the day for safety reasons so if you come to my door without any warning I may not answer!
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CityGarden 03:58 PM 05-17-2017
I have a drop off window (of one hour) and a pick up window (of 30 minutes) - these match out daily rhythm IF parents come outside of those drop off and pick up times their child might not be ready AND we may not be here since we often go to the park.

I also encourage parent participation so they feel involved.
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MarinaVanessa 04:51 PM 05-17-2017
I'm in CA and my analyst doesn't allow us to tell our clients not to come by during certain hours, like during naptime.

She feels like this goes against the open door policy. I'd be able to deny them entrance during naptime for drop off because their kids aren't in my care yet during that time but I can't stop them from picking up during a certain time.

So I just lock my doors and tell my clients to let me know beforehand if they're picking up during nap so I can take their child outside for them so the other kids don't get disturbed.

Most of my families understand how important naps are so I don't ever have an issue really except for those odd times that someone has an appointment or something that falls during naptime.
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The Play Room 07:42 PM 05-17-2017
I have an open door policy. Parents may drop off/pick up at any time during my open hours. I play music during nap time and often talk to non-sleepers, my kids have learned to sleep and not be disturbed by people talking or moving around. I do keep the lights dim and curtains partially closed to make the sleep space moderately dark.
Parents are always welcome to drop in to visit. If they wish to participate, I give them simple activities to do with the kids. So when my Nutrition lady, TA, or license consultant pops in the kids don't go crazy because an extra adult is here.
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Mike 08:30 PM 05-17-2017
Originally Posted by The Play Room:
I have an open door policy. Parents may drop off/pick up at any time during my open hours. I play music during nap time and often talk to non-sleepers, my kids have learned to sleep and not be disturbed by people talking or moving around. I do keep the lights dim and curtains partially closed to make the sleep space moderately dark.
Parents are always welcome to drop in to visit. If they wish to participate, I give them simple activities to do with the kids. So when my Nutrition lady, TA, or license consultant pops in the kids don't go crazy because an extra adult is here.
I'm still thinking about that part. There are positives and negatives to letting parents drop in for a short visit. If I do allow it, I would be limiting how long and how often, and limiting their contact with the other kids. I doubt I'll have more than 1 or 2 families for a while anyway. Probably going to start part time off hours until I get known a little, so not a big deal until I get going and go full time.

I will be doing open door, and allowing at least the occasional stop by for checkup, even if it's just to help parents be less afraid of a guy watching the kids.
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Max 11:16 PM 05-17-2017
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
I am always careful to elaborate my thoughts about this topic for parents.

Their understanding and mine are usually not the same.
How does that conversation usually go? What do you say to parents?

I have a dialogue in my head that I want to run through during interviews and would love advice on this

Originally Posted by Mike:
I'm still thinking about that part. There are positives and negatives to letting parents drop in for a short visit. If I do allow it, I would be limiting how long and how often, and limiting their contact with the other kids. I doubt I'll have more than 1 or 2 families for a while anyway. Probably going to start part time off hours until I get known a little, so not a big deal until I get going and go full time.

I will be doing open door, and allowing at least the occasional stop by for checkup, even if it's just to help parents be less afraid of a guy watching the kids.
I'm going to have an open door policy too, allowing for up to 15 min to visit (with the exception being my 2 week Trial Period, when parents can visit for a longer period of time). I wrote in my PH that I may ask parents to stop visiting if it becomes disruptive to our day. Since I'm new as well, I want to give parents that extra piece of mind by encouraging them to visit unannounced at any time.

I think this is an important piece - I'm going to explain to parents the difference between allowing access anytime and what my expectations are for visits, as well as why I can't let a parent hang out all day long. I figure if a parent seems to be abusing it (like visiting every. single. day.) then there are some trust issues and I can always term if it's becoming a problem and detracting from my care for the group.
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Blackcat31 06:43 AM 05-18-2017
Originally Posted by Max:
How does that conversation usually go? What do you say to parents?

I have a dialogue in my head that I want to run through during interviews and would love advice on this
I usually just say something like "I have an open door policy. This is what 'open door' means to me;....."

and I go on to explain pretty much what I said in my post above. I want parents to drop by unexpectedly now and then. But I don't want them to do it daily or regularly as it IS very disruptive to our day (I explain how).

I don't allow visits (due to confidentiality and privacy) and I elaborate on the reasons why in that regard as well.

Once I provide the provider definition of "Open Door" and the parent definition of "Open Door" most parents completely understand.

*********************************************************************

Speaking of parent perspective vs provider prospective, I had a DCD that worked close by. A couple times a week during his lunch break he would stop by and chat with his DD Janie while she was outside playing with daycare friends (Billy, Johnny and Sally). He would spend 10-15 minutes chatting with all the kids.

One day, he called and said "Hi Blackcat! I just wanted to let you know that I drove by the playground the other day and I noticed a strange man talking to the kids. Do you always let strangers be near the kids? It makes me uncomfortable that Janie is talking to a stranger."

I just chuckled and said "Oh, that is Sally's dad."

DCD says "Oh, well I don't know him so he's a stranger."

I said "Well, what do you think YOU are to Sally, Billy and Johnny's parents? You are a stranger to them."

DCD paused a minute (I swear I could hear the thought wheels turning in his head) before he said "Oh yeah. Duh."

Apparently it just never occurred to him that HE was a stranger to other kids/families just as he viewed Sally's dad to be.

So perspective is important so when I explain 'Open Door' policy and other policies to parents I try hard to explain it so that they are able to see other perspectives. It truly makes a difference in compliancy for clients.
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bklsmum 07:23 AM 05-18-2017
Yes but if they come they are taking their child when they leave. I only allow visits if it is a nursing mother. I also ask that they do not show unannounced at nap time.
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spinnymarie 07:53 AM 05-18-2017
We are required by DCFS to have an open door policy.
To us, this means you can drop off or pick up at any time during your allotted hours, and most parents pick up at random times throughout the week - usually within 90 minutes of their pick-up time. We don't mind this at all, some text us so we can help get shoes on before they arrive, but most do not
We DO require any visits to coincide with pick-up or drop-off; no coming to see your kid but not take them with you! We discourage sticking around if it is causing issues, and we will have a chat with the child about the problem, and the parents if it continues.
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AmyKidsCo 08:10 AM 05-18-2017
I have an open door policy also and let parents know they can stop by anytime, but I do ask them to LMK if they're picking up early or planning to stop by so I can let their child know. Children don't do well with surprises.
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thrivingchildcarecom 10:40 AM 05-18-2017
During a tour I will state that we have an open door policy. However, if a child gets upset and thinks that they are going to be leaving with the parent the parent will have to take them. I also advise them to avoid naptimes and to be respectful of the other children in care by not interrupting our schedule.

To be honest, in 13 years I have rarely had a parent follow-thru and take advantage of the open door policy.
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Meeko 12:13 PM 05-18-2017
Unless a provider is willing to do a full background check on every parent, and have someone to supervise the parent every. single. second.....they are playing russian roulette with the safety of the kids in their care.

After having a registered sex offender (rape of a child) coming to my daycare daily to "hang out" with his daughter (who we found out later he was abusing)..I learned my lesson.

I was proud of my open door policy and invited parents to come and spend time with us, help out etc. All rainbows and unicorns.....

My "open door" policy allowed this monster to be around a bunch of kids. The man was well spoken and well educated. He gave no signs of being dangerous until his daughter starting opening up to us.

An investigation showed no apparent harm to any of the other children, but it sickened me to think of them hugging him etc. He was having a REAL good time with them hanging all over him.

My other daycare parents were very supportive and understanding of the situation and completely understood why I did a 180 on having a revolving door for parents.

But I have always wondered what would have happened if one of the kids had told their parents that Becca's dad "touched" them. These parents placed these kids in MY care. MY job to protect them. What if the parents had been out for blood and targeted me, because I happily let this guy be close to their kids???

I won't ever put myself or the kids in my care in that situation again.

I explain to interviewing parents that open door means they can drop off and pick up any time they like (I discourage nap time) but they NEVER get to hang out. They can do that at home.
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Ariana 05:47 AM 05-19-2017
Originally Posted by Meeko:
Unless a provider is willing to do a full background check on every parent, and have someone to supervise the parent every. single. second.....they are playing russian roulette with the safety of the kids in their care.

After having a registered sex offender (rape of a child) coming to my daycare daily to "hang out" with his daughter (who we found out later he was abusing)..I learned my lesson.

I was proud of my open door policy and invited parents to come and spend time with us, help out etc. All rainbows and unicorns.....

My "open door" policy allowed this monster to be around a bunch of kids. The man was well spoken and well educated. He gave no signs of being dangerous until his daughter starting opening up to us.

An investigation showed no apparent harm to any of the other children, but it sickened me to think of them hugging him etc. He was having a REAL good time with them hanging all over him.

My other daycare parents were very supportive and understanding of the situation and completely understood why I did a 180 on having a revolving door for parents.

But I have always wondered what would have happened if one of the kids had told their parents that Becca's dad "touched" them. These parents placed these kids in MY care. MY job to protect them. What if the parents had been out for blood and targeted me, because I happily let this guy be close to their kids???

I won't ever put myself or the kids in my care in that situation again.

I explain to interviewing parents that open door means they can drop off and pick up any time they like (I discourage nap time) but they NEVER get to hang out. They can do that at home.
I agree with this entirely! To me an open door policy means they can come and get their child at any time but I do not allow any parent to hang out unless invited by me to do so (maybe a parent has a special talent to share with the group like drawing or music). It is just way too risky.

On another note is this a common request for everyone to have people come and hang out? I have never had a parent request it before!
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Pepperth 06:47 AM 05-19-2017
They can stop by early any time to pick up. They text me if it's at naptime because I'll have them use a different door. It makes my day easier and I like transparency.
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MrsSteinel'sHouse 10:22 AM 05-19-2017
They may pick up at any time. But, if they are coming during nap time, I need to know so I can "sneak them out" without waking anyone else up.
I do not encourage them to drop in and leave. Although I did have a mom come up for lunch one day. She was having a rough time- had just lost a baby and wanted to see her daughter who was 3. I explained mom wanted to come have lunch with us (thankfully I had a lunch that day we could easily share with mom) when it was over her daughter told her it was naptime and that she had to go lay down. It worked well. I guess what I am saying is that I have policies but sometimes there is special. The kids LOVED having mom here that day but since 95% of the time our days are not with interruptions, they are not thrown off schedule when we do get interrupted.
My parents are at work and I am 20 minutes out of town so popping in really isn't practical for them!
I encourage early pick ups. I do ask though for a time frame if they know so their kids know. I hate to say we are going outside and have Johnny upset that mom got here. I also ask if someone else is picking up that I know so I can be sure Johnny knows and doesn't get upset.
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sharlan 10:45 AM 05-19-2017
Parents may pick up at any time, but may not hang out.
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daycare 10:35 AM 05-20-2017
Parents are always welcome to come at any time.

When they pick up they will do it like any other time. Get kids things and go.

Parents only have access to the walk in foyer also known as the parent area. I will get those child and they will be brought to the foyer where they will quickly gather Thjngs and go.

I discourage pick ups during nap time, would never with hold a child, but if you keep doing it you're gonna find new care. Don't disrupt our naps.

I allow parents to volunteer in the class room one at a time when possible. I have to basically babysit them 100% of the time and only allow about 30-45 min for them to come in.

It's not only for the child's safety, but the parents too.

I tell a parent what would you do if little billy goes home and tells his mom you hit him or worse?? This is why I have to be able to watch the parent while they are volunteering.

I also had a similar experience like Meeks, but sadly it was someone on my extended family.
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Josiegirl 03:00 AM 05-21-2017
If parents want to come and hang out, create some family involvement times for all the dcfs to get together. I don't like it when a parent stays and stays, whether it's at d/o or p/u times. It disrupts our entire flow of the day. We're not on any strict schedule but if we start breakfast 30 minutes late, there goes our lengthy outside morning time. Plus I feel like I have to pay attention to the dcf while they're here so that means I'm not everywhere else that I should be. And you know how kids can be when a different person comes or the routine is flipped around a bit.
I can remember one potential dcm stayed and stayed one day, played outside with us and everything. I felt very uneasy about the whole thing and try to discourage that these days.
Now when a prospective dcf wants to stay 'awhile', I'll let them but I try to limit it to maybe 15 minutes to help their child get settled in. Or we start off care by doing just a couple hours or half a day to see how it goes, without mom here, then add on from there, to ease the child into our dc.
I still have 1 dcf who really plays into the whole 'my dds are crying so I need them to be happy before I can leave them' and I just feed the others on schedule. I hate it but deal with it. Very permissive parents and I'm sick of struggling with every rule with them. They're leaving for the summer very soon anyways and only have 1 more year here. They're not all bad and that's why I've kept them. Anyways......

Meeko's story scares me. And although we think we know our dcps, I guess ya never know.
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Tags:pick up issues, unannounced visits
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