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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Users & Abusers....I am NOT the One!!!
TBird 10:33 AM 08-09-2011
Why on earth is it that when people find out I have a daycare, they "ass"ume I want to "watch" their children FREE OF CHARGE, during off-hours, and just whenever they feel like being with their man???

Case in point.....
A lady I met through my son's baseball team (her son is on the same team). I only know her from the team....maybe shared some conversation with her (although she gets much too personal for my taste), she's given my son a ride a few times, I've given her son a ride a few times, etc. But that's it.

Well, now that she's identified me as a childcare provider she keeps inviting her 12 year old over here. Granted...my son likes him, he's a decent boy, etc. but I have a Licensed, organized, PAID daycare. I don't have adults & kids up and through here over my daycare kid's heads...it's just not right. I.....AM.....WORKING for goodness sake!!!

She texts or calls me with no notice, inviting her son (and most times his brother) over at least 3 to 4 times weekly under the guise that HE wants to play with my son. Mind you, she just told me that her boyfriend was back from wherever (and she'd like to be with him), and that SHE works from home and her kids are getting on her nerves. Okaaaaaay...so you've identified ME as the right person to give you a break??? I tell her that I am full and that I am a LICENSED provider so my business is regulated, etc. etc, maybe the boys can play on the weekend when I'm not at my PART TIME JOB. Yes folks....I have three kids of my own and I work 7 days a week most weeks!!! Naturally, I should be the one to give HER a break. WTH???

Sorry for the vent, it's just that I make this look easy and she's not the only one who tries to get their foot in my door (including family)...she's just the most recent. After about 3 weeks of her trying this, I finally told her today that this is a business and I can't just have them over here miscellaneously. I try to be sociable with people but most times I just wind up KICKING MYSELF!!!
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MyAngels 10:38 AM 08-09-2011
The next time she calls to say her son wants to see your son, just cut her off before she gets too far and say "That's great! DS will be over in a few minutes - thanks for inviting him!"

I sometimes can't believe the nerve of some people.
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TBird 11:05 AM 08-09-2011
Originally Posted by MyAngels:
The next time she calls to say her son wants to see your son, just cut her off before she gets too far and say "That's great! DS will be over in a few minutes - thanks for inviting him!"

I sometimes can't believe the nerve of some people.
I thought of exactly that (and my son would love it) but a person like her will then think I owe her something. It's a shame really.

Today she claimed she had a doctor's appointment. Okay so call me up (same day), and ask me to watch your two kids from 4:30pm to 9:30 pm (Oh and I'm glad she found a doctor that takes appointments between 4:30 and 9:30pm???). She actually said she'd pay me "like they are in my daycare" but news flash.....if they were in my daycare they would be outta here by 5:30...I don't do night care!!! UGH...just can't be friendly with people these days.
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MarinaVanessa 11:13 AM 08-09-2011
Whenever someone tries to send their kid over to "play" I just tell them (or their kid) that because of DC I can't have "guests" over to play. If they had sent their kid over on their own I add "...but you can ask your mom if it's ok for you guys to play at your house". For some odd reason they never come back to get my DD
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wdmmom 11:19 AM 08-09-2011
I'd email her a copy of your contract. Tell her that if she is needing care, she needs to enroll them. You need immunizations, all paperwork, a $100 enrollment fee for each child and your minimum rate is $200 a week.

Or just lay it out:

"Your boys are welcome to come and play AFTER I am done working and advance arrangements must be made. I also won't allow them to be here for dinner and I won't "babysit". They can come play for 90 minutes maximum each play date."
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jen 12:47 PM 08-09-2011
Yuck...I think people just figure, "Oh, whats two more." I always say, "oh, I'd love to, but with licensing regulations, I can't have anymore kids today."
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cheerfuldom 01:36 PM 08-09-2011
Who needs 5 hours for a doctor's appt?? Is there ANY business besides stores that stay open till 9:30?
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TBird 02:15 PM 08-09-2011
Originally Posted by cheerfuldom:
Who needs 5 hours for a doctor's appt?? Is there ANY business besides stores that stay open till 9:30?
At first (as I always do) I tried to give her the benefit of the doubt on this one until I thought it through a little further. Maybe she had to go to the next county for her appointment??? Maybe it was at a hospital??? Then again, any test I've ever had to have at a hospital was done during the day. I had a "mobile" MRI done once in the late evening though. But then again, an appointment like that you would know about ahead of time, no??? And you wouldn't leave yourself stuck for last minute care, no???

I don't know....I just get the feeling that she latched on to me as a source for a "break" or free childcare. I get so upset 'cause everybody does that to me. They wind up offering to pay me but I just don't do that type of care. Just because I "visibly" have myself together and my kids are together doesn't mean I'm not as frazzled, busy, poor, and in need of a break as the next person.
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Crazy8 02:26 PM 08-09-2011
I must wear the same sign on my back because it happens to me CONSTANTLY!!!!
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cheerfuldom 02:37 PM 08-09-2011
I must have some sort of "hell no" vibe because this has only ever happened to me once. Maybe I need to get out more.... Of course, I am not shy at all about expressing that I do not do free care, evenings or weekends, or any discounts.
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MarinaVanessa 02:57 PM 08-09-2011
Oh I have tons of stories when it comes to this. Once a lady neighbor came by and asked if I could keep an eye on her daughter for a "little bit" I said "Oh sure! Let me get all of the paperwork required by licensing and my contract and policy book really quick (walked away for a packet and while I was walking away over my shoulder I shouted) do you need a drop-in contract? It's just for the day right? That's $40 for full-day or $5 an hour. Nothing past 6pm or it's double!" You should have seen the look on her face. I asked her what was wrong and she looked surprised and asked "You're going to charge me?" I laughed and told her that "if wal-mart gave away all their merchandise for free they'd go out of business. That's just silly"
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cheerfuldom 03:13 PM 08-09-2011
The "you're going to charge me?" tells me should would have left her little one there a lot longer than a few minutes.
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Sugar Magnolia 04:30 PM 08-09-2011
You're too nice! I can give you some b***h lessons. Like Nancy Reagan once said "Just say no!" I like my friends to be guys, they never pull that crap. Sorry, but generally, I can't stand other women socially. And I avoid the mothers of my kids friends like the plague.
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TBird 05:56 PM 08-09-2011
Originally Posted by Sugar Magnolia:
You're too nice! I can give you some b***h lessons. Like Nancy Reagan once said "Just say no!" I like my friends to be guys, they never pull that crap. Sorry, but generally, I can't stand other women socially. And I avoid the mothers of my kids friends like the plague.
OMG!!! But who you just described is the REAL ME!!! It's my MOM who's always telling me that I have the b***h face on and that I'm generally unapproachable to other women & the dance class/sports moms. I try to change and be a little sociable for a bit and see what happens??? SEE SEE SEE SEE???
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Unregistered 06:03 PM 08-09-2011
Originally Posted by Sugar Magnolia:
You're too nice! I can give you some b***h lessons. Like Nancy Reagan once said "Just say no!" I like my friends to be guys, they never pull that crap. Sorry, but generally, I can't stand other women socially. And I avoid the mothers of my kids friends like the plague.
...the guy thing......it is so true! I also avoid the mothers like the plague! Such drama! and we have enough drama with daycare so this alleviates some of it :-)
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Sugar Magnolia 06:45 PM 08-09-2011
And you said she actually calls you to chit chat? While you're working? That's scary weird. Can't stand clingy, needy women who want you to listen to their stupid problems while you're working. Beyong rude. I had a single friend who either called, emailed or texted me EVERY day when she knew it was nap time.. And if I didn't answer, I got whiny "are you mad at me?....what's wrong?...." crap the next day. I finally told her to go away and she pulled some stalker-type crap after that. Yup. Guy friends ROCK.
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rjskids 06:57 PM 08-09-2011
I haven't had people think I would watch their kids for free but to go off on a tangent my DH used to own a home improvement business and he got that ALL THE TIME! People called him all the time wanting him to come over and "help" side their house or remodel their bathroom but really they just wanted him to do the work. It got to the point where he told EVERYONE no and I would feel bad for our close family that really did need help with things.
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cheerfuldom 07:09 PM 08-09-2011
I prefer guy friends too....women are annoying
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Ariana 09:31 AM 08-10-2011
Originally Posted by cheerfuldom:
I prefer guy friends too....women are annoying

Women are too passive agressive. If you had been upfront in the beginning about all of this and stood up for yourself the problem wouldn't be where it is now. Women try to be too nice!!

Let her know how you feel and nip it in the bud....you're a business women
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TBird 02:29 PM 08-10-2011
Originally Posted by Ariana:
Women are too passive agressive. If you had been upfront in the beginning about all of this and stood up for yourself the problem wouldn't be where it is now. Women try to be too nice!!

Let her know how you feel and nip it in the bud....you're a business women
Thank you for putting your foot in my behind Ariana...I needed that!!!

Truthfully, I fell for the "Okey Doke". She made small talk at first and the boys being on the same team really clouded my judgement. The requests were gradual and then intensified once we had a conversation about what we do for a living (my mistake again). The answer has always been no but I'm a SUCKA for even opening the door to the aggravation.
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flightlessbird11 03:28 PM 08-10-2011
Originally Posted by Sugar Magnolia:
You're too nice! I can give you some b***h lessons. Like Nancy Reagan once said "Just say no!" I like my friends to be guys, they never pull that crap. Sorry, but generally, I can't stand other women socially. And I avoid the mothers of my kids friends like the plague.


THIS!!!! I'm exactly the same. I get along with men bc I cant stand the drama,and caddyness.
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Tags:free childcare, parents - ask too much
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