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Baby Beluga 01:52 PM 03-16-2017
Our beloved class beta fish passed away this afternoon. He was swimming one minute and wasn't the next. Poor thing was old anyway, 2.5 years, and his behavior had changed so we knew it was coming.

Question is, for those who have had class pets how do you address the passing of the pet with the children? In my own family death is openly discussed as a normal topic but I know all families may not feel this way.
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daycarediva 02:00 PM 03-16-2017
I use the book 'sad' (or when I feel sad?) by Joy Berry, it touches on death in an age appropriate way.

I also let parents know that their child might have questions.

Pets are a great 'introduction' to death, imho.
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Baby Beluga 02:57 PM 03-16-2017
Originally Posted by daycarediva:
I use the book 'sad' (or when I feel sad?) by Joy Berry, it touches on death in an age appropriate way.

I also let parents know that their child might have questions.

Pets are a great 'introduction' to death, imho.
I agree.

I told the children and sent a text to the parents giving them a head's up. The children are already discussing names for a new fish
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Josiegirl 03:05 AM 03-17-2017
Awww You can also have them draw pictures of the fish. I had to put my dog down a few years ago and talked openly about being sad plus had the older ones draw pictures. They still remember her. I have no idea what to believe about life after death but I briefly mentioned doggie heaven to those that asked and had had previous experience with losing someone or a pet. We'd talk about their grammy playing with Meesha or their old dog romping across the field with my dog. I tried not to get into it very much and leave God details up to the individual family but at times could not avoid it either.
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DaveA 03:51 AM 03-17-2017
Originally Posted by daycarediva:
I use the book 'sad' (or when I feel sad?) by Joy Berry, it touches on death in an age appropriate way.

I also let parents know that their child might have questions.

Pets are a great 'introduction' to death, imho.
I don't use that book but I do tell parents what is going on. In the case of a classroom pet, the DCKs go pick out the new pet.
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Poptarts22 05:32 AM 03-17-2017
LOL! I take it your group consists of "city kids". Being from an agricultural community and the wife of a hog/dairy farmer, the idea of a text and lesson plan over a dead fish is comical...but variety is the spice of life :-). Just an observation on the differences-not a slight
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daycarediva 05:37 AM 03-17-2017
Originally Posted by Poptarts22:
LOL! I take it your group consists of "city kids". Being from an agricultural community and the wife of a hog/dairy farmer, the idea of a text and lesson plan over a dead fish is comical...but variety is the spice of life :-). Just an observation on the differences-not a slight

I have a mix of kids- some drive in from the country, one lives on a LARGE farm. We stopped buying fish when the city boy kept feeding him crayon bits.
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Blackcat31 06:17 AM 03-17-2017
I am in a pretty rural area and would not consider any of my kids "city kids" and we would still have a lesson and discussion about death. It's sad to lose a pet or person that you love, no matter how often you see it or experience it.

It doesn't minimize the sadness or loss simply because death is a part of every day life in other manners. Slaughtering animals, fishing and/or hunting is not even comparable in my eyes to losing a pet.

I would absolutely talk about it with the kids but I'd make sure to talk to the parents first so they can have the opportunity to bring the subject up with their child first or mention anything to you in regards to their thoughts/feelings on death.

I have a DC family that is super religious and I know they would probably approach the subject in a totally different way than another family I have in care so I would definitely talk to parents first and then have a group discussion about it with the kids so they can talk freely about it and process their feelings.

Pets are a great way to learn about death as a child.

Here is a great blog article about discussing death with kids:
http://livingmontessorinow.com/discu...worked-for-me/

Here is a list of books that are supportive of the discussion:
http://livingmontessorinow.com/best-...oks-death-pet/
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Baby Beluga 08:47 AM 03-17-2017
Thanks everyone!

One parent thanked me for the info and said her child has asked about death before and another parent didn't acknowledge anything - the fish passing or the text.

We live in the city, but there is farm land about 10 minutes north and south of us. So we have a good mix of cultures and beliefs towards animals. I've always been an animal lover, even the wee ones like fish. Many of our friends/family were surprised to learn that they actually make fish medication, even for the betas.

Our fish was old, was sick and was on medication. We knew it was coming. But as a responsible pet owner we recognized an illness and treated it. And since the fish had been a part of our daily routine for 2+ years it was a little sad seeing him go.
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Baby Beluga 08:48 AM 03-17-2017
Originally Posted by daycarediva:
I have a mix of kids- some drive in from the country, one lives on a LARGE farm. We stopped buying fish when the city boy kept feeding him crayon bits.
Oh boy!
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Tags:pet - fish, pets in daycare
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