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Parents and Guardians Forum>My Child Was Hurt By His Day Care Teacher
Unregistered 05:53 AM 12-17-2010
I am purposely leaving out names for legal reasons but I have to share an incident and more over how it has been handled.

My son is five and is at a licensed preschool in Knoxville. He's attended this facility since he was two and he has loved it and frankly, as parents, we have too. They have been extremely helpful over the years in helping identify some learning issues and such with my son. He's been in three different classrooms and attends "full time" and has since we started.

He's now in the class for the older 4-5 year olds (those that just miss the kindergarten cut off date) and my son recently came home with very dark bruises on his upper arm, so intense that you can actually see the finger prints of where he was grabbed.

When I picked my child up that evening, the teacher had pulled me aside to tell me he didn't have a great day and went to great extent to tell me what had happened. I thought this was rather curious, but was appreciative of her telling me so that I can help reinforce proper behavior, etc. (My son has been tested professionally with ADHD and is treated for it). During her explanation she never once told me that she grabbed him for any reason. She did say that when she was repremanding him for spitting on another child, that he laughed at her. And that really made her mad, I said I can understand and she responded that "It made my head spin." I found that also to be a bit extreme, but quickly dismissed it. She continued to say that it was very difficult for him to calm down after this and couldn't go to sleep during nap time, once he did fall asleep, nap time was almost over, so she let him sleep longer. I did find this very curious, as an ADHD kid, my son rarely stays upset over anything for more then a few minutes. I can't think of anything ever that has caused him to remain upset, he's very quick to distract himself and move on to the next thing.

later that evening, as my son was getting ready for bed, I noticed his arm and saw the marks, thinking it was marker, I tried to rub it off and he screamed. I stopped and asked what happened, he said to me: "I was a bad boy and when I laughed at Miss J*** she grabbed my arm and squeezed it really hard and made me cry.

So here's what happened after -
I called the director of the daycare, explained the incident. She wasn't sure what to do as she's been there over 25 years, she hasn't ever had to deal with this before. She attempted to have me meet with the teacher and her, but I refused. I told her that I wanted her gone, I didn't want to see the teacher, I don't want her near my child. She said she was going to speak with the principal of the school (the preschool is part of an elementary school) and would call me back. I offered to email photos she refused saying she believed me.

I heard back from her around noon, she reviewed the protocal and did the following accordingly - took statements from the teacher, from the other teacher in the room, contacted her licensing liason and when she wasn't able to reach her, she called her previous contact - who was reassigned to another county. She was instructed that the teacher is to be suspended and not allowed to return until there is an investigation and the licensing board will make a recommendation based on their findings. She also had to contact the DSC abuse hotline and report the incident.
I later met up with the director to show her the photos and my son's arm (which two weeks later, some of these marks are still visible)

The director did make the report to DCS, however, never offered the photos I gave them because as she said, they didn't ask for them. I have no idea what she said in the report. after three days, I never heard a word back from DCS, I got the report number from the director and called the local office in knoxville who told me they have screen out the report and will not investigate. I find this incredible, but their reply was that based on the report, the school had acted appropriately and the child wasn't in danger.

It is my understanding that she isn't allowed to return to work until the licensing board makes a decision and the director told me that they were waiting to hear back from the board. And if she's let back in the school, she will not be assigned to his same class, that she will move classes, and they won't disrupt my child's life by moving him to another class. I was also told that I would be told what the conclusion is before her coming back.

I'm pretty shocked that something as severe as this seems to be completely brushed under the table and frankly the overall lack of concern seems to be sending a message that I have done something wrong, that I am attacking the individual. I am concerned that this will be documented as "the parent made a false claim."

My son obviously got the best of this woman, and his behavior was wrong, and he deserved to be reprimanded, however, she should have the skills to control herself and act appropriately.
I am sorely disappointed at how this has played out and how I've somehow turned into the bad guy on this.
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Tags:2010, abuse, bad providers, behavior - aggressive, daycare abuse, discipline, injure, parental life choices, parental responsibility, parenting, violent behaviour
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