Wake A Sleeping Child?

[momma4many]

Did she nap? How long? Dcm was with him today and explained that she is not going to sleep until 8, when she used to go to sleep at 6:30 or 7 and is up at 5 or 5:30 b/c she is napping here. I told them I could not keep her awake, per state law. They asked if I would wake her up 30 min after she fell asleep. I said I didn't think I could, but let me look at my regs book and get back to them. What do you all think?

[Michelle]

how old is she?

[jen]

I wouldn't agree to that. There is absolutely nothing wrong with a child staying up until 8pm. Good Lord, any other ways to avoid actually spending awake time with your baby?

[daycare]

You need to make your own policy on napping
I don't offer services for children who don't nap

I would not allow for a child under 5 go without at least an hour nap.
If I were you, I would google the recommend amount of sleep a child needs for their age. Give it to the mom. Let her know that the child cannot function at DC with out a nap and you will let her sleep until she wakes.
Set a nap time ex 1-3:30...

[Cat Herder]

Here naptime is from "1-3 with childen waking naturally" for everyone 12 months and up.

Now, if they are encroaching afternoon snack (3:30) I may gently nudge them a bit to get up.

I would NEVER agree to a 30 minute nap. It simply is NOT in the best interest of the child.

Not a chance. We nap 1:30-3:30, then have snack and I also gently wake if they are not up by then. If they are too old for nap, they are too old for my daycare period. I make this clear at interview and should they ask later I remind that's my ONLY break in a 10+ hour day. I also remind this would affect the other napping children and how important sleep is for young children....

[sharlan]

Heaven forbid that the parents actually have to spend time with their child. Naturally as the child ages, they may sleep less.

I will not wake a sleeping child. If they can sleep through the noise of the other children, then they obviously need the sleep.

[daycare]

Originally Posted by sharlan

Heaven forbid that the parents actually have to spend time with their child. Naturally as the child ages, they may sleep less.

I will not wake a sleeping child. If they can sleep through the noise of the other children, then they obviously need the sleep.

ditto..... I have one kid that will sleep almost 5 hours here. I let them sleep, because I know that mom and dad let them stay up until 1am sometimes later.... I figure if the child can sleep through all the noise of the others, they really must need to sleep.

However, if I know that the parents put their kids down at a certain bed time, lets say 8pm, and the parents come to me and say hey I cant get the kids to bed until 10PM, I will nudge the kids around 3:45. I don't want to off set their sleeping schedule

[Mom_of_two]

Aside from young infants (til 4-5 months) naps are all scheduled. Babies also take an am 9-10:30, and everyone about 1-3:30 give or take. No sleeping longer, I wake them all up- mine, too. I think if a child can't function on the daycare schedule they are not fit to be here that day.

[cheerfuldom]

put baby on a schedule and thats that. don't let the parents talk you into doing all the "awake" time so the kid sleeps on their watch. Plus the less they sleep, the more exhausted and difficult they are going to be.

[Christian Mother]

I had a huge problem with a parent asking me to nap there 2 1/2 child at 10am til 12noon and keep him up so that by 6-6:30pm he'd be ready for bed bc dcd said that dcb gets up in the middle of the night. This little guy would not wake for you for anything and if you tried he'd scream. Grumpy... I used to get upset bc dad would get home at 11:30am and not pick up dcb til 4:45- just before 5pm when they where scheduled for there pick up at 4:30pm. So basically they had a couple hrs of play time with him and then bed. Not to mention dinner fits right in there. Wheres the family time with this little guy. Makes me mad. But, then again I termed this family last week so I won't worry about that anymore.

After 2 week of trying to comply to these parents I finally said nope to that schedule and said that I don't mind a 2 hr nap however; nap time would be when I arrange it as I needed all the kids a sleep together. This made the parents mad and dcm would not talk to me about it bc she preferred that I argue with her husband about it. I wouldn't bend. I don't believe in children under 5 not having a healthy nap schedule. They need it for there health. Setting a good nap routine and sticking to it is a must. I normally will nap 12-2 at least 3 hrs or when they wake them selves and children up to 2 1/2 - 4 are about 2 hrs or when they wake themselves. My child is 4 and takes a 2-3 hr nap every day. 5 yr olds I have sit quietly with a book or color while the kids sleep. I believe that if these children are not getting a good nap in then that is the cause of them waking at night. Good naps = Good sleep at night.

[momma4many]

I have gone more than one round with this dcd. The dcg is a great kid (13 months) and has adjusted wonderfully. He is a control freak. Always asking about who is here, how long, did she get to play with other kids today, etc. (I've written about him on here before) When she came here, she never napped. Now, she is a different kid! So happy, plays well, smiles all the time. She is really learning and growing so much every day. They have her here for at least 10 hours per day. He was upset a week or so ago b/c she would cry and reach for me when he picked her up to go home, so they took all of her comfort objects home and said she couldn't have a bottle here anymore. Fine, she is doing even better without them actually. Then he didn't want me to take state pay kids, then he said she was making mean faces and saying "no no"...blamed me and asked if I was mean to her and made mean faces. I had just 2 days before been talking and laughing with her mom about how she was mimicking me talking to my dogs. When they bark I do my serious face and say no to them. He was upset about it. I have had it with him. He was so upset today when they both came to pick her up that he slammed my door after telling me what he had to say over his shoulder.

I have decided to talk to dcm tomorrow morning and tell her that I am not willing to wake her after 30 min. I am also going to inform her that I cannot tell them who is here on what days or anything else about other kid's schedules as it is a privacy concern.

I really don't like this dude at all. I'm sick of feeling like an "employee" of his that he can boss around and bully.

I get the distinct feeling that she wants dcg here and he does not. I could care less anymore. I just love dcg and would miss her, but I just can't deal with grown adults slamming my door and acting like children. Maybe he needs a nap

[Christian Mother]

Parents I tell ya!!

What is it with parents and disrespect?!! Sounds a lot like the family I termed on Fri. You will have to go and read about it on my posts. I've been going rounds with this family for a yr now and have had enough. I got tired of this family always trying to control the way I run my childcare to soot them. Unbelievable!!

That was pretty rude of dcb and the way he talked to you. You have more calm then I do bc when when my dcd talked to me like that on fri. I went after him and told him that he doesn't get to talk to me like that ever. It was disrespectful and rude and I wouldn't have it. I think he was pretty shocked but no one gets to tell me how to run my daycare. It was quite a eye opener for him when he tried to tell me all the demands he would be making to me since I told him for now on he would need to start picking up his son at his scheduled time and not when he felt like it.

[nannyde]

Originally Posted by momma4many

I have gone more than one round with this dcd. The dcg is a great kid (13 months) and has adjusted wonderfully. He is a control freak. Always asking about who is here, how long, did she get to play with other kids today, etc. (I've written about him on here before) When she came here, she never napped. Now, she is a different kid! So happy, plays well, smiles all the time. She is really learning and growing so much every day. They have her here for at least 10 hours per day. He was upset a week or so ago b/c she would cry and reach for me when he picked her up to go home, so they took all of her comfort objects home and said she couldn't have a bottle here anymore. Fine, she is doing even better without them actually. Then he didn't want me to take state pay kids, then he said she was making mean faces and saying "no no"...blamed me and asked if I was mean to her and made mean faces. I had just 2 days before been talking and laughing with her mom about how she was mimicking me talking to my dogs. When they bark I do my serious face and say no to them. He was upset about it. I have had it with him. He was so upset today when they both came to pick her up that he slammed my door after telling me what he had to say over his shoulder.

I have decided to talk to dcm tomorrow morning and tell her that I am not willing to wake her after 30 min. I am also going to inform her that I cannot tell them who is here on what days or anything else about other kid's schedules as it is a privacy concern.

I really don't like this dude at all. I'm sick of feeling like an "employee" of his that he can boss around and bully.

I get the distinct feeling that she wants dcg here and he does not. I could care less anymore. I just love dcg and would miss her, but I just can't deal with grown adults slamming my door and acting like children. Maybe he needs a nap

13 month old having a half hour nap in ten hours? Ahhh NO

She would have a 1.5 hour nap in the morning and a 2.5 hour nap in the afternoon if she were here.

If she was up that much at their house she would go to bed way before eight. He wants the easy early bedtime. They want supper/bath/bed right after they get home so they don't have her up with them.

[Meyou]

OMG she's only 13 months and he wants to cut her naps?!?!?!?! Poor baby.

If she was here she would nap for 1-1.5 hours in the morning and 2-2.5 in the afternoon. I phase out morning naps between 18 months and 2 years old but only as each child is able to function without the nap. It's a case by case basis and my decision. I just go by their cues.

[momma4many]

Originally Posted by Christian Mother

Parents I tell ya!!

What is it with parents and disrespect?!! Sounds a lot like the family I termed on Fri. You will have to go and read about it on my posts. I've been going rounds with this family for a yr now and have had enough. I got tired of this family always trying to control the way I run my childcare to soot them. Unbelievable!!

That was pretty rude of dcb and the way he talked to you. You have more calm then I do bc when when my dcd talked to me like that on fri. I went after him and told him that he doesn't get to talk to me like that ever. It was disrespectful and rude and I wouldn't have it. I think he was pretty shocked but no one gets to tell me how to run my daycare. It was quite a eye opener for him when he tried to tell me all the demands he would be making to me since I told him for now on he would need to start picking up his son at his scheduled time and not when he felt like it.

Good for you! I will go back and read your posts for some inspiration.

[momma4many]

Originally Posted by nannyde

13 month old having a half hour nap in ten hours? Ahhh NO

She would have a 1.5 hour nap in the morning and a 2.5 hour nap in the afternoon if she were here.

If she was up that much at their house she would go to bed way before eight. He wants the easy early bedtime. They want supper/bath/bed right after they get home so they don't have her up with them.

Yes, this exactly. He doesn't have any problem telling me that he does not want to deal with her and wants her in bed early. NOT my problem. Just don't know how to get that accross to him. I have tried several diplomatic ways to tell him that what I do here is my concern, not her schedule at home. That has nothing to do with me. What I do is what works here/ what is best for her during the day. Just one of those people who want to put their issues on other people I guess.

Originally Posted by Meyou

OMG she's only 13 months and he wants to cut her naps?!?!?!?! Poor baby.
I know . She was absolutely miserable when I first started watching her. Now she is so happy all the time. Wish they cared about that!
If she was here she would nap for 1-1.5 hours in the morning and 2-2.5 in the afternoon. I phase out morning naps between 18 months and 2 years old but only as each child is able to function without the nap. It's a case by case basis and my decision. I just go by their cues.

Yes, same here. I told them yesterday that if she is rubbing her eyes and rolling around on the floor....she is tired. I don't even wait until she gets to that point, I just put her down at the same time every day and she goes to sleep. Even if she doesn't sleep the full time, she lays quietly in the pnp and rests. She really needs that time or she is CRABBY! They said to just not let her sleep and I will have to deal with her being crabby and crying all day. Yeah. Right. Not going to happen here. No matter how I explain these things to them, they just can't see past their own nose. I feel bad for this kiddo b/c they may very well pull her out and find someone else. She has already had 4 or 5 caregivers and she is only 13 mo!

[nannyde]

Originally Posted by momma4many

Yes, this exactly. He doesn't have any problem telling me that he does not want to deal with her and wants her in bed early. NOT my problem. Just don't know how to get that accross to him. I have tried several diplomatic ways to tell him that what I do here is my concern, not her schedule at home. That has nothing to do with me. What I do is what works here/ what is best for her during the day. Just one of those people who want to put their issues on other people I guess.

Yes, same here. I told them yesterday that if she is rubbing her eyes and rolling around on the floor....she is tired. I don't even wait until she gets to that point, I just put her down at the same time every day and she goes to sleep. Even if she doesn't sleep the full time, she lays quietly in the pnp and rests. She really needs that time or she is CRABBY! They said to just not let her sleep and I will have to deal with her being crabby and crying all day. Yeah. Right. Not going to happen here. No matter how I explain these things to them, they just can't see past their own nose. I feel bad for this kiddo b/c they may very well pull her out and find someone else. She has already had 4 or 5 caregivers and she is only 13 mo!

Unfortunately you may have ran into a family that really likes the interview process and the hiring process. They like the way providers behave around them when they are seeking care. They like being the boss of someone.

Once they are in day care and real life starts in they have lost that position and the provider no longer responds to them like she did during the interview. This causes them to create conflict around the care so they can sit back into the interview seat and be the boss again.

If they don't get to be the boss then they just leave and start their beloved interview process all over again. Rinse and repeat. This would explain the large number of providers the child has had.

If you just got caught in this traffic there is NOTHING you can do to keep them with you. Even if you did keep the kid up all day then they would find something else. That something else will be illnesses first because a baby that age not sleeping is going to end up with one sickness after the other. They will be upset that she is so sickly and blame it on your lack of cleanliness or the other kids.

It's a looser so just make up your mind what you will and won't do and quit having lengthy discussions with them.

Tell them she will take two solid long naps at your house which is appropriate for her age. If they want to have her in bed earlier then it's best they make sure they get outside with her every evening and run her like crazy. Make sure she has tons of Mommy and Daddy time... long story time... good bedtime routine etc. Just talk about what THEY do with her after pick up that will net them an easy/early bedtime.

When he brings up the fact that he doesn't want to deal with her then the answer is: Welcome to parenting Daddy. I know SO many people who feel like you do. Being a parent is hard work. You are SO lucky she goes to bed at eight. I have relatives that can't get their one year old to bed till nine. You are actually doing REALLY well with an eight p.m. bedtime.

[momma4many]

QUOTE=nannyde;118603]Unfortunately you may have ran into a family that really likes the interview process and the hiring process. They like the way providers behave around them when they are seeking care. They like being the boss of someone.

Once they are in day care and real life starts in they have lost that position and the provider no longer responds to them like she did during the interview. This causes them to create conflict around the care so they can sit back into the interview seat and be the boss again.

If they don't get to be the boss then they just leave and start their beloved interview process all over again. Rinse and repeat. This would explain the large number of providers the child has had. Great observation. I think you're on to something here.

If you just got caught in this traffic there is NOTHING you can do to keep them with you. Even if you did keep the kid up all day then they would find something else. That something else will be illnesses first because a baby that age not sleeping is going to end up with one sickness after the other. They will be upset that she is so sickly and blame it on your lack of cleanliness or the other kids. Yep. I came to this same conclusion last night. No matter what I do, he will not be happy.

It's a looser so just make up your mind what you will and won't do and quit having lengthy discussions with them.

Tell them she will take two solid long naps at your house which is appropriate for her age. If they want to have her in bed earlier then it's best they make sure they get outside with her every evening and run her like crazy. Make sure she has tons of Mommy and Daddy time... long story time... good bedtime routine etc. Just talk about what THEY do with her after pick up that will net them an easy/early bedtime.

When he brings up the fact that he doesn't want to deal with her then the answer is: Welcome to parenting Daddy.Love it!!

I know SO many people who feel like you do. Being a parent is hard work. You are SO lucky she goes to bed at eight. I have relatives that can't get their one year old to bed till nine. You are actually doing REALLY well with an eight p.m. bedtime.[/quote]I actually said something along these lines to him a week or so ago and his response was "I don't care about other parents you know, I care about me" No joke! Unreal!

[MissAnn]

Originally Posted by momma4many

Did she nap? How long? Dcm was with him today and explained that she is not going to sleep until 8, when she used to go to sleep at 6:30 or 7 and is up at 5 or 5:30 b/c she is napping here. I told them I could not keep her awake, per state law. They asked if I would wake her up 30 min after she fell asleep. I said I didn't think I could, but let me look at my regs book and get back to them. What do you all think?

Too bad, so sad! Good grief.....

Sorry to inconvenient you by having your child go to bed at the wee hours of 8:00! Sorry you have to spend more than an hour with your child in the evening. I'm sure it's VERY hard! Oh sure...I'll be glad to wake your child after 1/2 hour so I can spend quality yet cranky time with her and maybe if I am lucky, she will be so cranky that she will wake up all the other kids and then they too can go to bed at 6:30 for their parents!


Ummmm....NO!

[littlemissmuffet]

Originally Posted by momma4many

QUOTE=nannyde;118603]Unfortunately you may have ran into a family that really likes the interview process and the hiring process. They like the way providers behave around them when they are seeking care. They like being the boss of someone.

Once they are in day care and real life starts in they have lost that position and the provider no longer responds to them like she did during the interview. This causes them to create conflict around the care so they can sit back into the interview seat and be the boss again.

If they don't get to be the boss then they just leave and start their beloved interview process all over again. Rinse and repeat. This would explain the large number of providers the child has had. Great observation. I think you're on to something here.

If you just got caught in this traffic there is NOTHING you can do to keep them with you. Even if you did keep the kid up all day then they would find something else. That something else will be illnesses first because a baby that age not sleeping is going to end up with one sickness after the other. They will be upset that she is so sickly and blame it on your lack of cleanliness or the other kids. Yep. I came to this same conclusion last night. No matter what I do, he will not be happy.

It's a looser so just make up your mind what you will and won't do and quit having lengthy discussions with them.

Tell them she will take two solid long naps at your house which is appropriate for her age. If they want to have her in bed earlier then it's best they make sure they get outside with her every evening and run her like crazy. Make sure she has tons of Mommy and Daddy time... long story time... good bedtime routine etc. Just talk about what THEY do with her after pick up that will net them an easy/early bedtime.

When he brings up the fact that he doesn't want to deal with her then the answer is: Welcome to parenting Daddy.Love it!!

I know SO many people who feel like you do. Being a parent is hard work. You are SO lucky she goes to bed at eight. I have relatives that can't get their one year old to bed till nine. You are actually doing REALLY well with an eight p.m. bedtime.

I actually said something along these lines to him a week or so ago and his response was "I don't care about other parents you know, I care about me" No joke! Unreal![/quote]

Oh gross! This guy gives me the creeps and I don't even know him. Personally, I wouldn't be able to deal with his attitude... well, I could, but I would choose not to. I am here to guide children through their first few years of life... not guide parents. I am so tired of whiney, bratty parents who act way worse than children ever do - and they KNOW BETTER! I would say "Listen, these are the rules, I RUN this daycare not you so either deal with it, or leave - and if you're staying, NO MORE WHINING!" They'll terminate soon enough.

[TBird]

That is insane if you ask me. Firstly, for thinking a child that age can even FUNCTION without a nap and secondly wanting that child in bed by 8:00 without any time with mom & dad.

I have a 3 year old in my DC who is from Greece. His mom was REALLY pregnant and just had the baby via c-section last week. Well, she wants the 3 year old NOT to have a nap so he will go to sleep early at night. I'm thinking that this is gonna be a "catch 22" for her. She'll really miss him having that nap when they go back to Greece and she's struggling with him and a brand new baby. He's three and he's super quiet when the others are napping so I'll let him lie down and watch TV, but the days that he falls asleep there is NO WAY that I'm waking him up!!! Obviously if he falls asleep, he's tired and needs his REST!!!

[momma2girls]

NO way, I do not wake up anyone either. That is ridiculous to think that parents want to put them to bed early. They actually really think that we are going to wake children up after a 1/2 hr. so that they can wake everyone else up, and be cranky the rest of the day. I don't think so!!!

[cheerfuldom]

wow, that one DCD is so unbelievable. I agree though that there are parents that love to have a power trip and make sure you know where your place is (hired help one tiny step above a random burger flipper).