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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Kind of Irritated - Suppose to Call If They're Late
tenderhearts 03:41 PM 01-27-2010
I have a dcb that has been with me almost 1 year. I have had a few issues with the dad but I really like the boy. Today he didn't even call and he never showed up. He is scheduled to be out thursday and friday but if he decided to make other plans for today he should have called me to let me know, his birthday is friday so I bought him a present and we were having cupcakes today along with another birthday today and dad didn't know but still makes me mad, I'm getting paid for the day either way so I suppose it shouldn't make me mad but its so inconsiderate I just don't understand some people, he's suppose call me as it states in my contract if they'll be late and some times he does and sometimes he doesn't. Sorry just had to vent
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originalkat 03:56 PM 01-27-2010
When I saw him on Monday I would ask how his birthday was over the weekend...oh you are __ years old now... Then I would say "Oh I wished I would have known he wasnt going to be here last Wed. because I had a party planned for him. Oh well...I'm glad he had a good birthday though." Hopefully the dad will say he is sorry for not calling and learn a lesson to be considerate and call. We can only hope!
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gbcc 05:23 PM 01-27-2010
I completely understand your frustration. Last year I planned a huge V-Day party and made lots of treats, had crafts planned etc. Well it was weird because most of my children ended up not being there. I found out about 2 the night before, 3 that day, and 1 never called. I went through all that trouble for nothing. All the parents knew we were doing it. Then some of them had the nerve to come ask where their kids valentines and treats were. I said, they didn't participate so I gave the extra candy and coupons (free Wendy's Frosties)to the other children that shared valentines. I didn't think it was fair to ask that. Just like at Christmas, if you don't bring a gift, you don't get a gift. I am really debating this year on whether or not to do it.
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MarinaVanessa 09:37 PM 01-27-2010
It really erks me when a parent doesn't call so say they are late or not showing up. I have regular business hours (6am-6pm) but each family has their own contracted of hours they are allowed to bring their kids on. If they are running late and don't have the consideration to call, I don't have the consideration to wait for them.

For example, I have 2 dcb's and their mom used to be late and not call. Well I talked to her but she'd still be late. Her pick-up was 4:30 and she wouldn't pick him up until 5 or 5:30 sometimes then say "Oh but you're open till 6 right?" GRRR. So what did I do? I gave her a 15 minute grace period and then left to do shopping, pay bills etc. AND TOOK HER TWO BOYS WITH ME. Then I'd wait for her to call my cell phone

HER "Um, I'm here to pick up my kids" (she's at my house)
ME "Oh sweetie you missed me. I had things to do today and since you didn't call I figured you were running late and didn't know how late you'd be so I brought them with me. I'm at (wherever I was at the time). You can come over and get them here. It's a good thing you called because I was on my way to (another city) next and you would have to drive all the way out there to pick them up. See you soon."

I had to do it a few times and always made it inconvenient for her to get them. Now keep in mind that this only worked because she lived 20 minutes away from me but worked in the same town which is why I watch her kids. If she would have gone home she would have driven 20 minutes out of her way then 20 minutes back to pick her kids up when I got back home, then another 20 minutes to get back home so she HAD to come to me to pick her kids up. I have to admit that I also put my phone on vibrate and didn't answer once she got to the store (or place that I was) so she had to get out of her car to find me and her kids and I made sure that we were always MOVING so it made it harder for her to find us .
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momma2girls 05:08 AM 01-28-2010
Originally Posted by MarinaVanessa:
It really erks me when a parent doesn't call so say they are late or not showing up. I have regular business hours (6am-6pm) but each family has their own contracted of hours they are allowed to bring their kids on. If they are running late and don't have the consideration to call, I don't have the consideration to wait for them.

For example, I have 2 dcb's and their mom used to be late and not call. Well I talked to her but she'd still be late. Her pick-up was 4:30 and she wouldn't pick him up until 5 or 5:30 sometimes then say "Oh but you're open till 6 right?" GRRR. So what did I do? I gave her a 15 minute grace period and then left to do shopping, pay bills etc. AND TOOK HER TWO BOYS WITH ME. Then I'd wait for her to call my cell phone

HER "Um, I'm here to pick up my kids" (she's at my house)
ME "Oh sweetie you missed me. I had things to do today and since you didn't call I figured you were running late and didn't know how late you'd be so I brought them with me. I'm at (wherever I was at the time). You can come over and get them here. It's a good thing you called because I was on my way to (another city) next and you would have to drive all the way out there to pick them up. See you soon."

I had to do it a few times and always made it inconvenient for her to get them. Now keep in mind that this only worked because she lived 20 minutes away from me but worked in the same town which is why I watch her kids. If she would have gone home she would have driven 20 minutes out of her way then 20 minutes back to pick her kids up when I got back home, then another 20 minutes to get back home so she HAD to come to me to pick her kids up. I have to admit that I also put my phone on vibrate and didn't answer once she got to the store (or place that I was) so she had to get out of her car to find me and her kids and I made sure that we were always MOVING so it made it harder for her to find us .
Start a new contract, stating I am available for work and commute times only. THen take your times out of your contract, then explain you can't do 6-6 any longer, some will abuse this and abuse this and abuse this,as I have found out countless times!!!
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tenderhearts 08:36 AM 01-28-2010
It is really frustrating and this boy sadly will not get the present on got for him. That is alot of nerve for the parent to ask for the party stuff even though they weren't there, I just don't get some people. All my families are generally pretty good about things just this one dad, I also am open 6:30-5 but they put what THEIR contracted hours are and I had a mom that dropped off one morning at 7:45 when their hours are 9 am and I told her right then that she was lucky that I was up and open because at this time I dont' have anyone contracted until 8:30 and some times later I just happened to be up this morning so if you're going to be earlier than your arrival time more than 30 min call me the night before, she has not done that since. However this dad never comes at his contracted time at 8 am and I've told him many times to call me if he's going to be late and he does for awhile then it stops, in the summer we were waiting to go on walks so I finally just left if he showed up he would see the note on the door, but he was even later than that. Some people just have no consideration for others. He made a few comments and said oh you didn't do any activities today? I said nope he got here after we already did them. Grrrrr. I think some people just dont' get it and this guy seems like the type that gets a thrill out of not following the policy to see what you'll do. This same blocked my whole entire drive way every drop off and pick up, no one including my husband could get in and out, so I asked him to please not block it, he just ok, he didn't do it for the next couple days then started doing it again, so I mentioned it again he stopped for a few days then started again, so finally my husband said something to him and now he doesn't do it, like he doesn't like a female telling him what to do or something. I'm going to do what originalkat said and tell him too bad he missed the party I had for him.
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gbcc 08:51 AM 01-28-2010
My first family, before I had smartened up and revised my contract used to abuse my hours all the time. She would always come late and we would have to sit around and wait for her to walk through the door. There were times we missed out on things due to not being there on time. So I started to just leave and say it's her problem. Now, in addition to this, everything is scheduled a month in advance and they all get the monthly calendar. So she could have looked to see we had a field trip planned. Once I did this and she had the nerve to call me all mad because I wasn't there. I asked her if she looked at the schedule for today and she said she did but thought I would wait. I explained it wasn't fair to the other children that we had to miss things because we were waiting for her to show up when half the time she didn't even show. She asked to drop him off and I said, oh sorry you can't I already paid and since I had the extra seat my son invited a friend. She had to take the day off from work.
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tenderhearts 09:25 AM 01-28-2010
That's funny, I used to wait and start activities until he got here and I finally said screw that so now I start at the scheduled time and nine times out of ten he misses all of it, sometimes he comes in as we're finishing up and it's a pain in the butt but I just make him sit down and wait until we're done which he doesn't like and throws a fit. It is nice to be paid for the day and you're watching like 3 hours less each day. I will definetly remind him come nice weather that we leave for our walks by this time and if you aren't here too bad, we're not waiting so it will be up to him, now if this dad had a job he probablly would be more prompt.
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gbcc 09:35 AM 01-28-2010
The mom I was referring to worked at walmart so I don't know how she could be 3 hours late. I heard they don't put up with that. I don't care for the child anymore due to other issues and me reporting them to cps. The boyfriend found out she was dropping off late and in the end he discovered that she was having an affair and lied about her schedule times! She expected me to watch the child while she had her little affair! LOL, it ended up being her boss at walmart!!
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momma2girls 09:47 AM 01-28-2010
Originally Posted by gbcc:
The mom I was referring to worked at walmart so I don't know how she could be 3 hours late. I heard they don't put up with that. I don't care for the child anymore due to other issues and me reporting them to cps. The boyfriend found out she was dropping off late and in the end he discovered that she was having an affair and lied about her schedule times! She expected me to watch the child while she had her little affair! LOL, it ended up being her boss at walmart!!
WOW!! TOO FUNNY!!!! I have never had one of these, at least I don't think!!!LOL!!!!
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momma2girls 09:49 AM 01-28-2010
Originally Posted by tenderhearts:
That's funny, I used to wait and start activities until he got here and I finally said screw that so now I start at the scheduled time and nine times out of ten he misses all of it, sometimes he comes in as we're finishing up and it's a pain in the butt but I just make him sit down and wait until we're done which he doesn't like and throws a fit. It is nice to be paid for the day and you're watching like 3 hours less each day. I will definetly remind him come nice weather that we leave for our walks by this time and if you aren't here too bad, we're not waiting so it will be up to him, now if this dad had a job he probablly would be more prompt.
I do this as well!! In the summer, spring, fall, when we go for walks, outside activities, etc. if we are not here, when parents drop off, they will have to come and find me. I know I have one that is contracted for 7:30 and sometimes gets dropped off at 9 or 9:30. I can't wait for Spring, so we can all go outside, walks, etc....
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momofboys 09:53 AM 01-28-2010
Originally Posted by MarinaVanessa:
It really erks me when a parent doesn't call so say they are late or not showing up. I have regular business hours (6am-6pm) but each family has their own contracted of hours they are allowed to bring their kids on. If they are running late and don't have the consideration to call, I don't have the consideration to wait for them.

For example, I have 2 dcb's and their mom used to be late and not call. Well I talked to her but she'd still be late. Her pick-up was 4:30 and she wouldn't pick him up until 5 or 5:30 sometimes then say "Oh but you're open till 6 right?" GRRR. So what did I do? I gave her a 15 minute grace period and then left to do shopping, pay bills etc. AND TOOK HER TWO BOYS WITH ME. Then I'd wait for her to call my cell phone

HER "Um, I'm here to pick up my kids" (she's at my house)
ME "Oh sweetie you missed me. I had things to do today and since you didn't call I figured you were running late and didn't know how late you'd be so I brought them with me. I'm at (wherever I was at the time). You can come over and get them here. It's a good thing you called because I was on my way to (another city) next and you would have to drive all the way out there to pick them up. See you soon."

I had to do it a few times and always made it inconvenient for her to get them. Now keep in mind that this only worked because she lived 20 minutes away from me but worked in the same town which is why I watch her kids. If she would have gone home she would have driven 20 minutes out of her way then 20 minutes back to pick her kids up when I got back home, then another 20 minutes to get back home so she HAD to come to me to pick her kids up. I have to admit that I also put my phone on vibrate and didn't answer once she got to the store (or place that I was) so she had to get out of her car to find me and her kids and I made sure that we were always MOVING so it made it harder for her to find us .
LOVE IT! You are gutsy but I agree with you whole-heartedly!
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mamajennleigh 11:44 AM 01-28-2010
I think it's gutsy, too, and it sounds like something I would do lol!

I have a first-time mom that deserves a rant thread all of her own, but for now I will just tell this story:

One morning, she wasn't supposed to be at my house until 8:30am. At 7:30am, I was walking around the kitchen with no shirt on, waiting for my iron to heat up so I could iron my shirt. All of a sudden, I hear someone come in the front door - it was her and the baby!!! I was so flippin' angry . I sat her down and had a talk with her after she told me that she came early because she needed to go to the store and didn't want to take the baby with her: I told her that I would have completely understood if she needed to drop the baby off early, but two things would have to happen from here on out if she expected me to remain the caregiver for her daughter. Here is basically what I said to her:

"Number one, you must never, ever again walk in my front door when I am not expecting you. What if I had heard you messing with my door knob, thought you were an intruder, and decided to grab the first big knife I see in my kitchen, and stab you to death as you opened the door? I'm a big ol' fraidy cat and I would have done exactly that if I hadn't been too busy trying to get my shirt on!

Number two, you must never, ever again show up at my house unannounced and more than 15 minutes early without calling me first and getting the ok. I am a person who keeps your child for you, not a 24-hour Wal-Mart where you can drop your child off whenever. I do not have "business hours" here; I keep your child based on a verbal agreement of hours that YOU SET. If you need those hours to change, we will need to have another VERBAL agreement so that I am not running around my house half-naked when you get here and so that I do not mistake you for an intruder and kill you when you open the door."

Now, at this point I had been watching her baby for about a month or two, and each week that they paid me, they would always round the money up to the nearest $20 bill and call it a bonus because they were too lazy to get change. When I told her the above, she came back at me with some lame excuse about how the reason they gave me those "bonuses" was because I was so flexible with their schedule and they thought the extra money "bought" them some rights to deviate from the schedule. I had to explain to her that in the real world, you get a bonus because of your past performance, not because of what you are expected to do in the future, and that if the bonuses came with strings attached, I would rather they kept them, because this is my home, not a store and from that point on she had better not show up unannounced again or I would terminate.

Funny, I never got another bonus from her. Now, her husband gives me an extra $5 or $10 here and there, whenever he's the one who pays me, but nope, not her. She comes from a wealthy family that thinks money solves all problems and that you can buy anything. We've had to have conversations about how I do not work for her whenever she speaks to me like an employee.
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momma2girls 12:29 PM 01-28-2010
Originally Posted by mamajennleigh:
i think it's gutsy, too, and it sounds like something i would do lol!

I have a first-time mom that deserves a rant thread all of her own, but for now i will just tell this story:

One morning, she wasn't supposed to be at my house until 8:30am. At 7:30am, i was walking around the kitchen with no shirt on, waiting for my iron to heat up so i could iron my shirt. All of a sudden, i hear someone come in the front door - it was her and the baby!!! I was so flippin' angry . I sat her down and had a talk with her after she told me that she came early because she needed to go to the store and didn't want to take the baby with her: I told her that i would have completely understood if she needed to drop the baby off early, but two things would have to happen from here on out if she expected me to remain the caregiver for her daughter. Here is basically what i said to her:

"number one, you must never, ever again walk in my front door when i am not expecting you. What if i had heard you messing with my door knob, thought you were an intruder, and decided to grab the first big knife i see in my kitchen, and stab you to death as you opened the door? I'm a big ol' fraidy cat and i would have done exactly that if i hadn't been too busy trying to get my shirt on!

Number two, you must never, ever again show up at my house unannounced and more than 15 minutes early without calling me first and getting the ok. I am a person who keeps your child for you, not a 24-hour wal-mart where you can drop your child off whenever. I do not have "business hours" here; i keep your child based on a verbal agreement of hours that you set. If you need those hours to change, we will need to have another verbal agreement so that i am not running around my house half-naked when you get here and so that i do not mistake you for an intruder and kill you when you open the door."

now, at this point i had been watching her baby for about a month or two, and each week that they paid me, they would always round the money up to the nearest $20 bill and call it a bonus because they were too lazy to get change. When i told her the above, she came back at me with some lame excuse about how the reason they gave me those "bonuses" was because i was so flexible with their schedule and they thought the extra money "bought" them some rights to deviate from the schedule. I had to explain to her that in the real world, you get a bonus because of your past performance, not because of what you are expected to do in the future, and that if the bonuses came with strings attached, i would rather they kept them, because this is my home, not a store and from that point on she had better not show up unannounced again or i would terminate.

Funny, i never got another bonus from her. Now, her husband gives me an extra $5 or $10 here and there, whenever he's the one who pays me, but nope, not her. She comes from a wealthy family that thinks money solves all problems and that you can buy anything. We've had to have conversations about how i do not work for her whenever she speaks to me like an employee.
omg!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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originalkat 03:52 PM 01-28-2010
One Morning a daycare dad...who is supposed to get there between 8 and 8:30 showed up at 7:00 (my opening time). I purposly left the towel on my head and told him he needed to let me know ahead of time if he needed to drop off early. He has NEVER done that again!
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tenderhearts 03:56 PM 01-28-2010
I've done that before too, I have a dc mom who is suppose to drop off around 8 well she showed up at 7 am and actually called because all the lights were off so of course woke up everyone in the house, I was dressed just got out of the shower, I told her that if she was going to come early she needed to let me know the night before, she said oh I thought you opened at 6:30? i said well yes IF I have someone contracted for that time but I dont' so I'm not open until the next contracted time, she said oh and apologized, she came early again about 7:30 and actually waited in her car until I opened which I saw her when I got done so I opened the door for them but she now calls, her schedule is kind of all over so she's gotten in the habit of saying oh I'll drop off at this time tomorrow.
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momma2girls 05:22 PM 01-28-2010
Originally Posted by tenderhearts:
I've done that before too, I have a dc mom who is suppose to drop off around 8 well she showed up at 7 am and actually called because all the lights were off so of course woke up everyone in the house, I was dressed just got out of the shower, I told her that if she was going to come early she needed to let me know the night before, she said oh I thought you opened at 6:30? i said well yes IF I have someone contracted for that time but I dont' so I'm not open until the next contracted time, she said oh and apologized, she came early again about 7:30 and actually waited in her car until I opened which I saw her when I got done so I opened the door for them but she now calls, her schedule is kind of all over so she's gotten in the habit of saying oh I'll drop off at this time tomorrow.
THis is a main reason I took out my times in my contract, and wrote in this yr. I am only available for work and commute times only!! BOy has it worked nice!!! Everyone should adopt something like this!!! I had parents abuse and abuse and abuse it!!!!
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